Responsibilities of a wife in the family. Internal causes of conflicts in the family. Purpose of marriage and family relationships

There is no happiness in marriage, you need to bring it there.

What are the responsibilities of husband and wife in the family from the point of view of the ancient wisdom of the Vedas?
Some may say that Vedic family duties are not suitable for our time, saying that they are difficult to observe, but it should be noted that it is failure to observe these duties that leads to problems in the family and causes divorces. But divorce does not at all guarantee that the next marriage will be more successful, especially if a person does not begin to study the topic of the responsibilities of husband and wife, and does not try to build his family life on reasonable principles.

There is often a great lack of mutual assistance, attention, sensitivity, understanding and support. The responsibility to care for one another involves attempting to demonstrate the other's gifts to serve the Lord, an aspect we will return to later in this article.

The third of the seven commitments is to love one another. Let's do our best to keep the flame of love alive. Love is not an automatic emotion that survives on its own. It must be implemented and expressed. If neglected, it cools quickly.

“Maris, love your wives,” the apostle says several times in Ephesians. Can't we express love or communicate it? If so, we have not paid our debt, and yet we are guilty before God. In the world, people can say, “I don’t love him anymore,” and, as if they couldn’t change anything, the situation of their marriage breaks down. But to a large extent, love is a choice, and unless a great sin is committed, love should never be allowed to fade or fail.

So let's try to understand what they are the main duties of a wife and husband according to the Vedas. These responsibilities did not arise out of nowhere; they have strong justifications, because they are based on knowledge of male and female nature, and take into account male and female psychology.

If we want to improve relationships in the family, create harmony and mutual understanding, the right thing to do is to study our responsibilities and try to follow them, and not poke our soulmate’s nose into his responsibilities, because this will create even more problems and disagreements in family relationships. You need to start with yourself.

Love begins with respect for others and constant politeness. He moves on, with deep affection for others and concrete actions full of goodness. He then values, cherishes and thinks of his spouse, so that the sacred bond of the offering with each other is forged. He must not stop expressing himself in these terms.

The Apostle Paul commands husbands to love their wives because Christ loved the Church, that is, a love that is ready for sacrifice, a love that never ceases to bless. To keep love alive, in some cases certain sins must be avoided, such as the habit of not saying no. If we think only about our troubles and our problems, about our hobbies and our pleasures, about our activities and our goals, we will not have much emotional energy to love our spouse.

Responsibilities of a husband in the family

Let's start with men, because the man is considered the head of the family. Women can read the husband's responsibilities for reference only, but should focus on their responsibilities. Men, on the other hand, should focus on studying and fulfilling their duties, and may not delve into the duties of their wives.

In the same way, self-pity dries up every true feeling for another. Someone may have gone through difficult times, having faced many disappointments in life, but if that person does not give himself time to reflect and falls into constant regret, his love for another will not flourish.

Pride also harms love because it makes a person feel it to such an extent that no one else expects. All available emotions are then spent on their own successes, achievements and failures. The duty to care for the spiritual condition of another.

The husband must earn an honest and decent income, providing the family with everything that is really necessary.
He is obliged to provide each family member with protection and patronage.
A man must be a spiritual leader in the family and inspire all its members with his example.
Ideally, according to the Vedas, the husband should free his wife from the need to earn a living in order to give her the opportunity to maintain cleanliness and order in the house, cook food and raise children.
Also, a man himself should take part in raising children.
The husband is obliged to satisfy the sensual needs of his wife, but he must do this in accordance with the sacred scriptures, avoiding what is unlawful.
A man must take care of older and younger relatives (his and his wife), providing them with all possible assistance.
The husband is obliged to observe etiquette when communicating with other women, and also to protect his wife from the excessive attention of other men.
A man is responsible for the relationships between his family members, even if the relationship ends in divorce.

O. G. Torsunov “Responsibilities of a man in the family”

The fourth of the seven commitments is to care for each other spiritually. God will be held accountable for the level of spiritual help we offer to another. Obviously, this begins with praying for each other, and prayer begins with praise. If we sincerely thank and thank God for our husband or wife, we will be reluctant to fall into senseless and selfish feelings of bitterness towards each other. Let us pray for his well-being, for his spiritual blessing, for his health, for his happiness, for his success at work and for everyone to fulfill his role as a parent and his service to the Lord.

Responsibilities of a wife in the family

The husband has no right to reproach his wife for not fulfilling her duties if he himself does not fulfill his own. Likewise, the wife has no right to accuse her husband of failing to fulfill his duties if he does not fulfill his own.

The wife must do housework, cook food and keep the house tidy and clean (if cleaning is difficult, ask her husband).
She is not obliged to earn a living, but can engage in activities that bring her satisfaction and some money (unfair earnings are excluded).
The wife is obliged to raise the children.
A wife should actively help her husband become a true spiritual leader for his family.
The wife is obliged to give birth, raise and properly raise at least one child. The Vedas say that parents are obliged to give the world worthy offspring.
A wife, like a husband, must take care of relatives, both her own and her husband’s, and help them to the best of her ability.
The wife is obliged to observe etiquette when communicating with other men, and also to protect her husband from the excessive attention of other women.

O. G. Torsunov “Responsibilities of a woman in the family”

Thank God for your first love and also for the great blessings you have been the object of throughout your life. Read the Word together and talk about spiritual things. Husbands, women, are you talking about spiritual things? It happens so easily that after several years life together the spouses know each other so well that they have almost nothing left to say to each other. Therefore, the conversation is limited only to earthly needs. However, we have a duty, a responsibility, to stir up spiritual interest and start a discussion.

This may cover specific topics and doctrines, or the needs of God's work in the local church, nationally, or abroad. We can also talk about new directions and current trends that especially require prayer. Or, share your own efforts to share the gospel with some people and intercede for them. Above all, we must encourage ourselves to be dedicated, devoted to Christ, and to acknowledge His authority and His purposes.

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Leonid Tugutov “What an ideal wife should be”

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The fifth of the seven obligations is to assist or further the spiritual service of another. The husband must say: “I must facilitate our spiritual service.” Paul tells us, “You were bought at a good price; do not become slaves of people." In saying this, he addresses both free citizens and slaves. Clearly this does not encourage slaves to abandon the master to whom they belong, but reminds them that as willing slaves of Christ, their highest priority should be in His service, regardless of their position.

We are in the service of our employers and our families, but the highest priority for husband and wife is to serve Christ. Very often the husband is engaged in the work of the Lord, he is very busy, blessed, highly valued and fulfilled. What about his wife? What does he do to enable him to be of service to the Lord outside of caring for his family? Our duty is to help each other in this area, and not to deprive the other of the higher goal of his salvation.

A man must have three qualities:

Know the highest purpose and meaning of life- self-awareness, knowledge of one’s true spiritual nature, knowledge of God and the development of love for Him. Otherwise, a man will not be able to be a spiritual leader in the family and ensure reasonableness and proper development relationships. Not knowing the higher purpose and meaning of life, he slides into animal satisfaction of his own feelings, which contributes to the spiritual degradation of the entire family. Therefore, it is in the interests of a woman to find a worthy man who knows why a person was given life and can lead all family members to achieve this highest goal.
Have fearlessness and determination. Aware of the goal human form life, a man becomes fearless in achieving this goal, sacrificing temporary material pleasures and suffering.
Be generous. This does not mean giving everyone everything and being left with nothing, because a man has responsibilities in the family, which are no less important than possessing this quality, so reasonableness is needed here. A wife receives everything from her husband - wealth, position in society, reputation, children, and a house... this is her honor, this means that she deserves it. In turn, the woman inspires the man and serves him. If a woman achieves everything herself, without a husband, this does not honor her. Therefore, her position and glory is that she receives everything from her husband, and she is able to inspire him to do something great.

Five roles of a woman in family relationships:

The role of the wife. It is the wife's responsibility to remind her husband of the purpose of life and his responsibilities if he forgets. Not to be confused with reproaches and accusations.
The role of a lover. The wife should become the best lover for her husband, so that he does not even think about other women. A wife should look more beautiful at home than when going to the store or to work. The beauty of a wife is important to her husband when she is next to him, and not when she is elsewhere.
The role of the daughter. When the husband is not in the mood, when he is angry or dissatisfied with something, the wife should accept the role of a daughter, which means not annoying her husband, being calm, humble and obedient.
The role of the sister needed in cases where the husband is not able to pay much attention to his wife. Then the wife is content with any attention from her husband, without claiming more. She seems to temporarily become his understanding sister.
The role of the mother It is appropriate to show that if the husband is sick, helpless or overwhelmed by problems, then the wife should behave like a caring mother.

Alexander Khakimov “Family Code”

Part 1

Sometimes neither the husband nor the wife is useful for the work of God because they attach too much to the material world, be it their beautiful car, their big house or the standard of living is such that all their energies and efforts are concentrated on business, social advancement and the accumulation of goods. They are successful financially, but none of them are serving the Lord, or perhaps just one of them, because they have not sought to achieve the main goal of life. They would be much happier! It's better not to have something so wonderful social status and rather be in the service of Christ.

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Part 2

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The husband must say: Mine the main objective- to advance our service to the Lord, and not just to please ourselves. Although the Lord has called the husband to be the head of the family, husband and wife are equal in the eyes of God, and neither should deviate or be indifferent to the call of the other.

The duty to please each other. The sixth of the seven obligations is to please each other. This is an important aspect of the duty of benevolence. Let's ask ourselves the following question: Am I giving friendship or rather causing pain and bad attitude to my wife or husband? Couples, of course, share their burdens. This is part of the blessings and privileges of marriage. But they shouldn't do this all the time because it would be unbearable and selfish. Therefore, it is important to limit the sharing of difficulties.

Sergey Serebryakov “Family Relations”

Starting a family

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Children

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Think something good, something pleasant. Never dwell too long on your sorrows and sufferings. Bear the burden if you can, with the help of the Lord, and do not bring it unjustly on another. Let us remember that we have a mutual responsibility to encourage and edify in marriage. Responsibility to influence each other.

The seventh mutual commitment in marriage is the responsibility of influencing each other. Please note that this is a reciprocal influence. If the influence is one-sided, then it is an imposed limitation, a yoke and a painful experience. We must influence each other's behavior with courtesy, kindness, gentleness and humility, not only influencing, but influencing.

Methods of dealing with family difficulties

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Responsibilities of a man

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Martin Luther called school marriage characteristic, and it's true. Are we too proud to accept advice or help from our spouse? Or we complain about our husband or wife's behavior with anger or unreasonable impatience. Mutual influence is exercised with patience, and therefore most accusations should never be carried against each other, but rather buried in love and forgetfulness.

Usually, a big difference between a husband and his wife in terms of donations and ways of thinking. They have their own strengths V different areas, and they also have different personalities. It is clear that we need great affection and patience with each other. If someone is constantly irritated by others, it is probably due to pride; a disgusting and intolerant pride that refuses to recognize the gifts of another, his abilities, his feelings, his recognition and which is not ready to adapt to human differences, which are quite natural.

Responsibilities of a woman

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The mechanism of destruction of peace in the family

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Let us pray to God to save us from pride in marriage, because he is a mortal saboteur and will learn to love even the innocent imperfections of the behavior and thoughts of another. Duties, duties and obligations are the essence of mutual goodwill in marriage. Notice again the intentional weight of words in the words of the apostle Paul: “Let the husband restore to his wife the kindness that is due to him; and that the wife should return it to her husband.” This is a two-way debt.

We were slaves to sin and it was our master. We were doomed to condemnation and hell, to ever-increasing internal corruption and to being slaves to erroneous and perverted ideas. We were slaves, doomed to tragic end and to our destruction, and yet we were redeemed from all this.

External causes of conflicts in the family

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Internal causes of conflicts in the family

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Let's say you run a company and you can't avoid paying off your debts. The company is completely owned by you, but it went bankrupt and fell into a lot of debt. You are going to go bankrupt and lose your company, your home and everything you have. But at this particular moment, someone comes to you and, sympathetically, says: “I’m buying your company.” Your business is not worth it, you have huge debts. However, your generous benefactor says to you: I buy it with the amount of your debts, whatever they may be, so that you can stay once and for all.

Christ saved us from eternal debt. We have been released from condemnation and received a new and better life, a glorious and eternal habitation, all thanks to the precious blood of Christ. Are we fulfilling our responsibilities? May God bless us and help us in this. It is well established in Islamic jurisprudence that marital rights go hand in hand with responsibilities. If the husband takes care of the family, the wife owes him, in return, fidelity and obedience. Allah, the Most High, says: “Virtuous women are obedient and protect what needs to be protected in the absence of their spouses, with the protection of Allah.” As far as they are concerned, they have rights equivalent to their obligations in accordance with decency.

Ruslan Narushevich “Asceticism and service in family relationships”

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A married couple is not only about love and mutual understanding. Partners have their own responsibilities and follow the rules established in marriage. Without meeting these conditions happy family will not work.

Responsibilities of husband and wife

Still have primitive people a division of work was organized between men and women in the family. In those days, the tribes lived on the level of instincts and still understood the differences between the responsibilities of a wife and a husband. Now practically nothing has changed. Only in the process of evolution did the rules and responsibilities become more complex and expanded.

The man in the family is the breadwinner. Previously, he simply got food, but now he has to bring money into the house. Also, a man has always been a protector for his wife and children. A reliable man's shoulder is a big plus for a strong family.

The woman always took care of the comfort in the house and prepared food. The birth and raising of children was also on her shoulders. Nowadays, the wife’s range of responsibilities has been somewhat expanded. This is due to progress in the world in all areas of life.

Responsibilities of a wife in marriage in the modern world

Now the situation is social sphere has changed somewhat. More and more often you can find families where most the work is done by a woman. She manages to earn money and take care of all family members. This turn of events is associated with democracy in almost all states.

The only duties of a wife that have not changed over thousands of years are bearing children and looking after them. This point can be considered not so much a woman’s work as a calling from nature. Motherhood has always been a priority for women.

IN modern world More and more women are abandoning this role and finding themselves only in their careers. This approach also has a right to exist.

The wife is the “neck” and the husband is the “head”

This proverb was not in vain invented by our ancestors. Clever woman always builds relationships in such a way as to reduce the percentage of conflicts in the family. The partner guides her husband in the “right direction” gently and not persistently. Thus, he feels important and indispensable in marriage.

Psychologists believe that a woman should not be a leader in decision-making, otherwise, feeling his weakness, the husband will stop taking part in the decision family problems. A wife can only guide her partner and help him make a decision that will be beneficial to her. Such a union, based not only on love and passion, but also on respect and patience, will be strong and prosperous.

Family rules in Islam

Marriage between people of this religion is based on special rules. In such a family, it is not allowed to violate traditions and centuries-old customs. The duties of a wife in Islam are clearly regulated, and deviation from the rules is strictly punished.

In this faith, girls are taught from the cradle to unquestioningly obey their husbands. A girl who gets married must be able to lead an ideal life and care for children. In such marriages, divorce at the will of the wife is not provided for.

A woman is not allowed to be in in public places Without a husband. She has no right to wear revealing clothes or communicate with other men. It would be difficult for a European woman to come to terms with such rules, and representatives of Islam do not see life in a different direction.

With progress in the world, traditions change in some families, but the main points of behavior remain the same.

Happy union

A successful marriage can exist provided that there is order and tranquility in the house. These items are usually monitored by the wife. It is the woman who most often knows how to arrange life in such a way that all family members feel comfortable.

It is traditionally believed that the responsibilities of a wife in a family include:

cooking food;
care for children;
cleaning the house;
supporting her husband in his endeavors;
caring for sick family members.

Several decades ago, these points were unquestioningly fulfilled only by women. IN modern families this work can be shared among all family members. A respectable husband does not consider it shameful to help his wife manage her life.

But still, the bulk of these responsibilities remain on the shoulders of women. Prepare delicious dinner and greeting your husband from work with a smile is also an important component family life. No matter what anyone claims, you won’t be satisfied with feelings alone. And the proverb that the way to a man’s heart is through his stomach is true.

How to make women's work at home a pleasure

The wife's work in the house can be quite exhausting, and on this basis conflicts often arise in the family. To avoid such situations, you need to clearly plan your day. You shouldn’t try to solve all your everyday problems at the same time. You need to be able to separate urgent matters from those that can be postponed to the next day.

It is very important to always maintain your appearance in order. Otherwise, the husband will quickly lose interest in his wife and begin to look at other representatives of the fairer sex.

In this way, the wife's responsibilities in marriage will not tire her, and she will be able to devote enough time to her partner. Don't forget about marital duty. It should not be perceived as a duty or obligation. A woman should receive joy from sex, only then will she be relaxed and seductive in bed. Giving pleasure to your soul mate is already a man’s prerogative.

All of the above items must necessarily be the responsibility of a woman. Without them, the marriage union will turn into simple cohabitation. Love for your husband and children will strengthen the family for many years.

Marriage is hard work. Not everyone can be responsible for someone other than themselves. Therefore, when getting married, you need to be sure that each of the two partners has learned to give in and sacrifice their interests.

Young families often break up due to stubbornness and ambition. This is due to the fact that partners do not want to fulfill their responsibilities towards each other. Participants in early marriages often face this problem. Young people are not ready to work for the good of the family, so you need to join a family union after gaining a little life experience and patience.